Swimming Upstream - Integrating your kids

When  family members and other adults help a lot w/ your kids - communicate. 

Remember that they love you and the child, that they were raised the same way you were and so have common understanding of how the world should operate.  However, you should discuss your views of discipline, acceptable behavior and how your children are being raised differently than from your own childhood.  Their views of how  children should be raised probably differ from their childhood also.

 Having a family member or trusted outsider assist you with your children is good for them.  It assists them in understanding social, cultural, and familial differences and similarities.  Children need to feel a part of the family, the church, the community, and the world.  By encouraging other people to interact with them on a regular basis they learn to understand their part in the community. It also helps their later assimilation into society proper.
Teaching kids that some rules transcend space (no matter whose house you are in you don't bite) but others are determined by the authority (at Susie's house we always hold hands to say grace at the dinner table) assists them in learning flexibility, respect and how to honor diversity in an appropriate way.